The Inconvenience of Literacy

Here is something I wasn't expecting. At the age of 38 I have discovered a fondness of reading. This is pretty strange considering I have been completely opposed to reading for most of my life. A fact that was made evident by my super low English grades in Middle, Jr., and Sr. High as well as during my 5 (ahem) years in college. It's cool. I eventually graduated all the necessary grades to be a functioning adult. Anyway....

I wouldn't say it's a fully developed love of the written word, but it's on the way. In other words, we have been on a couple dates and are getting very close to having the important DTR conversation. The attractive thing about reading that I recently discovered is that when you get to read something you find interesting it can actually be fun. (Mind blown. Right?!?)

What I find interesting is people and their lives. This led to the reading of mom blogs. Oddly enough, Blog reading came AFTER I started writing a blog of my own. (I'm sure that most people don't start writing a blog before actually reading blogs or anything really, but that is just who I am. I like to do things the hard way.) Reading about all of those moms and their familiar lives led to reading memoirs. I had no idea the memoir genre existed and I certainly had no idea that they would be something that would interest me. The word suggests sappy sad stories about old people who have passed their prime, but it turns out anyone can write a memoir including young, interesting, and (most importantly) funny people.

Now you are speaking my entertainment love language.

So any way now I'm reading all the memoirs and all the blogs and listening to all the podcasts. My introverted self just wants to hang out in my room all day and read all the things. Sure the kids need dinner and baths, but Mama's got a super important Presidential podcast to listen to and books about what it's like to be Lauren Graham and How NOT to raise entitled kids to read. Here's some frozen pizza and some baby wipes.... I may need an intervention... eventually.

People who know me, I know what you are thinking.... "Who are you?!?"

It's super weird, right? I don't even recognize myself anymore. But it's cool because my new obsession means I can do what I love while wearing leggings and my favorite Ugg slippers and that makes me very very happy.

Here's a few things I'm enjoying and looking forward to enjoying...

I mentioned last time that I just finished reading Bossy Pants by Tina Fey. And you know I loved it.

I finished Sophie Hudson's Giddy Up, Eunice right before reading Bossy Pants. I love Sophie and I genuinely believe we could be best friends. Except for the fact that we don't actually know each other. Anyway Eunice is a great book on the importance of generational friendships, something I've had on my heart recently.

Ok so this book isn't necessarily funny, but I am really enjoying it. I am a child of the 80s and 90s and so Kimberly Williams-Paisley is one of my Romantic Comedy idols. The Father of the Bride movies are among the most watched of my comfort movies. I love the inside look into her life and career and marriage to cutie Brad Paisley. But it's the story of her mom's battle with dementia that really tugs at your heart. This disease hits pretty close to home for me so I have to read this one in spurts when I'm in a good mood and able to handle the seriousness of the subject.

 Home Is Where My People Are is the next Sophie Hudson book I am diving into. I have been obsessed with Boo Mama and her buddy Big Mama (Melanie Shankle) for a while thanks to their blogs and podcast and I won't stop until l have read all the words they have to say.

 So, This one is not a shocker. Loralei Gilmore wrote a book and I must read it. And I love the title.

I found Melanie Dale on twitter this summer and immediately wanted to be a fly on the wall of what ever room she is in. She is hilarious and real and has a great blog and podcast as well.

These last two books look interesting and life affirming which is always good.

And then there are the podcasts. Where have these been all my life? Here are the 3 I am totally into at this moment....

Do yourself a favor and get to know The Popcast with Knox and Jamie. You're Welcome.

I love Jamie Ivey. She is so bubbly and charming and is great at interviewing some awesome women.

And BONUS the word on the street is she is writing a book!

This Presidential podcast was suggested by Jamie Golden of the Popcast. I started listening to it on Friday (Inauguration Day) as kind of a "let's remember where we have been and how far we have come, America" in order to be a little less stressed out by the current political climate. 

I started with the Bushes (but have since listened to others and they are all so good) because as I have mentioned before, I love me some George Bush. It is what is, y'all. I can't explain it, wait yes I can...Did you see how cute he was with his rain pancho at the Inauguration? 

Even Cheney seemed to get a chuckle out of it.

So as you can see, I wan't kidding. The new obsession is a real one. Don't worry or call child protective services just yet. Things will level out soon and I will be back to running around crazy with my kids and spending all my down time watching Netflix. Right now, I am just enjoying this time when my body desires to be still and mind is thirsty for information. It's good to try something different every now and then.... even if it is reading. But as always, everything in moderation.

 Besides, I've got a reputation to protect.



FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
January 2015
I just went in to brush my teeth... And then I started flossing, and plucking my eyebrows, and cleaning out my pores, and then I lost track of time for a couple of hours. 
#gotobed 
#thisneverhappenstomyhusband

What do Carseats and Library Fines have in common? My glamorous life.

So I'm homebound today with a sick child. Same child. Same sickness as before. She's sweet and a pretty easy patient if you don't count the cleaning up of the vomit. I paused for a second trying to decide if I should actually type that gross word, but couldn't really come up with a less offensive alternative. Also, sometimes being a parent is just gross.

I don't want to me dramatic... except yes I do... but I feel like you haven't really been inducted into the society of motherhood until you have cleaned a vomit soaked car seat. Y'all. This is no small feat. I have heard that there are some lucky parents out there (and I do mean lucky because there is no other explanation) that have never actually experienced this. (I am comforted by the thought that these people will end up with a very poopy puppy one day to make up for this.) There are other people (aka the Summys) who have had more than their share of carseat vomit. I have taken apart and a washed and reassembled carseats no less than 20 times since having kids. It's painstaking and disgusting and I hope to receive a special reward in heaven because of my faithfulness to keeping my kids safe and clean as we ride to school/church/ChickFilA and back.

PSA for the day:  I will say, if you are reading this and in the market for a carseat Britax seats are not only our favorite for safety reasons, but the covers are very easy to remove and reattach which makes all the difference. While I'm pushing particular products... Chicco infant seats are our other favorites for the same reasons.

The good thing (if you have to pick a good thing about your child being sick. I felt like I needed to add that little disclaimer so I don't look like I enjoy sick children) about being homebound is that I didn't have to go to the gym today. I'm apparently boycotting exercise these days. Which is super inconvenient because I'm also supposedly trying to lose weight. I say supposedly because we all know that when you get this close to 40 there is no hope of losing weight without the hard core combo of very strict diet and extreme workouts and I'm not actually doing either of those things. sigh. Just typing those words was exhausting.

I'm hoping this boycott ends and I can get myself back to the gym soon if for no other reason than most of my Christmas gifts involved some type of athletic wear. Before the holidays I was super motivated to workout and was excited to start the year off with new gym clothes and a "Can do it!" attitude. I'm still recovering from the holidays, but I'm certain that motivation will return eventually.

Until then, these new clothes are also great for going to Kroger, cleaning the house, and sitting on the couch to finish a good book.

Today I FINALLY finished Tina Fey's hilarious Bossy Pants. I checked this book out from the library months ago. That's right, I said months. If you are thinking, "Wow! that's a super long time for someone to have a library book", you would be right. I have renewed the book as many times as it allowed and have been holding it hostage since the last due date (December 18th) knowing full well that I was being charged $.10 for every additional day. If you have done the math then you know that is a full 30 days and $3.00. I rationalized to myself that as long as I didn't pay more in late fees than the book was worth on Amazon, then I was still being "smart".

"Smart" is a relative term.

But I finished it and I really did love this book. I have no idea why it took me so long to finish it. Yes I do....Kids. School. Homework. Lunches. Baths. Church. Cooking. Cleaning. ReCleaning. More Cooking. and Bible Study (this is a big one because I have a personal rule that I can't read anything secular until I have read my Bible that day and sometimes that was very late in the day... or honestly the next day). I have lots of respect for Tina Fey and enjoyed her storytelling. Of course there was some abrasive language, but I overall appreciate her down to earth outlook. And of course... she is ridiculously funny.

So that is my day in a nutshell plus a few product advertisements which should make my dad proud because it's almost like I used my college degree. Almost. Not really. Sorry Dad.

Have a great day and if you are reading this say a little prayer that none of the other family members gets sick. Or if they do, that they manage to wait until after they get out of the car. Thanks.



FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
January 2014
Cleaning a house that is under construction seems completely pointless and overwhelmingly necessary at the same time.

Just Shy of Creepy Mom Status

Tonight I did weird thing.

I went into my 3 year old's room while she was sleeping and I picked her up and went into a different room to rock her in the dark. I promise I'm not usually a weirdo mom. You know, like that creepy mom in the children's book "I'll Love You Forever". I could never read that book to my kids because the thought of an 80 year old women crawling through the window to rock her adult son was as disturbing as some horror movies I've seen. But I digress...

Tomorrow is Lou's 4th birthday and we have all been very excited about it. Birthdays are big in this family and we have been celebrating our baby all week. But this is also DNOW weekend at our church which means we will have a house full of teenagers all weekend. Needless to say I have been a bit preoccupied getting ready for both events.

So tonight I came home from a particularly great worship service feeling super pumped about the next few days and I walked into the girls' bedroom and saw her sleeping. Something just came over me and I collapsed. I literally fell to my knees and started sobbing. I had missed putting her to bed on her last night as a 3 year old and it was almost more than I could bear.

Now I feel like I should point out that I'm usually not very sentimental about babies growing up. None of my children have baby books with their measurements and lists of their "firsts" and I have never cried at a first day of Kindergarten, but something was different tonight. As I sat there in the dark rocking my almost 4 year old and crying in the room that used to be her nursery, I thought "what is happening to me? Why am I doing this? Did I feel this way when the others turned 4?" 

That's when it hit me...I don't remember the other two turning 4. Sure I can remember the parties I had planned, but I don't really remember THEM at this age because both times I also had a 6 month old baby. I don't know about you guys, but the first year of a baby's life is complete chaos in the Summy home, and I spent most of that time I'm a sleep deprived fog. So this transition is something I'm  experiencing for the first and last time. For someone who doesn't handle change very well, this is the sort of thing that causes some type of emotional break down or at least the need to spend the better part of an hour looking at old baby pictures and eating Cinnamon Toast Crunch. (Am I being a bit dramatic? Probably so, but that is just who I am as a person.)

The bond between me and little Lou is a special one. Of course I don't love her more than the others, but there is just something special about that last baby that gets this Mom a little choked up. Lou and I have had a lot more "just the two of us" days than I had with older two. I have become more relaxed and confident as a mom since having her. I have learned to play more and listen more and give more grace with her. I learned to spend extra time snuggling with her because I knew that time would not last forever. I caught myself enjoying motherhood a little more. Maybe I'm actually growing up with her. Just as I nervously experienced all the firsts along with Amelia, I'm celebrating all of the lasts with Louisa. Soon I will graduate from a mom of babies and preschoolers to a mom of elementary and middle schoolers. (Maybe that is what all the crying is about. Lord be near.) 

Things are changing in our little family and this is just the beginning. These 3 children that God has given us are each so very different. I know he has big plans for them all if I'm willing to let them go and grow and if I teach them to follow Him. That is my job as their mom. But tonight she is still three and still just a baby and so I rocked her just a little longer while watching her sleep.

Okay... maybe I am starting to sound a little bit like the creepy old Love You Forever mom. Time to look at cute pics of the birthday girl to lighten the mood!

Happy 4th Birthday to my sweet Louisa! She is as smart and hilarious as she is cute!

***Have any of you found yourself overly sentimental and acting super weird with your last baby?


FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
January 2016
How many brownies is too many brownies for breakfast? 

When it snows, aint it thrillin? Though your toes get a chillin.

It's a good ole southern snow day in Tennessee y'all.  Which of course means we have approximately 1 to 2 inches of the white stuff and the entire city has stopped to enjoy the view. Well except for my husband, but let's not dwell on that.

For the last couple of days I have been trying to write my New Years post. For some reason (kids, cleaning, cooking, dieting, sleeping) it is taking me a while to gather all of my "welcome 2017" thoughts. And then this little snow day thing happened and distracted me and I started writing about today. The New Years post is already a week behind, what is a few more days?

I (finally at 2:45pm) sit here on my nice warm couch looking out the window at the winter wonderland. I've been haunted all day by the expectation to create magical memories of each blessed snow day. I'm kind of over it.

I was thinking this morning while in the shower (seconds after my children barged in on my naked self to ask if we could go out and play in the snow...my son may never recover) I kind of wish that we lived a little further north so that snow would be a little less of a novelty. Since it only snows 2 maybe 3 times a year in the southeast, there is a tremendous amount of pressure to soak up every second of this weather phenomenon.

Don't get me wrong. I love snow. I really do. I remember as a kid the excitement of snow, but specifically the excitement of watching the TV waiting to see if my school's name would be listed as one of the cancellations. Come to think of it, I don't remember ever actually playing in the snow as a kid. or making snow cream. or sledding. And I surely don't remember my parents taking part in the festivities. Parents in the 80s were not in the business of making magical childhood moments. One of the many reasons I wish we could go back to the 80s. (others include: hanging at the Mall, being dropped off at the skating rink, the Cosby Show, and of course the Reagan/Bush political era. Sorry if I just offended any democrat readers, but I have always had a thing for the Bushes.)

Honestly, as a 2017 mom, I kind of dread this whole snow day thing. I know we aren't supposed to admit this, but snow days are a ridiculous amount of work for the mom. First of all, my family in general is a lazy bunch of folks. We like to take it slow in the morning. Saturday. mornings are made for watching cartoons and reading and coffee drinking. But we get a little frozen precipitation and suddenly my kids are up and at 'em at 7am fully dress and wanting to go play. "Hold your horses kiddos. What's the rush? Mama needs her coffee and sittin time." 

I firmly believe that snow days should be a dad thing. I'm not the "run around outside" parent when the weather is pleasant and certainly don't have the desire to do it when it is cold and the closest thing to snow boots I have is my super cute rain boots that leave my toes vulnerable to frostbite. I should point out that none of us actually have decent snow apparel. Because as mentioned before these things would only be used 2 out of 365 days a year and as any finance smarty pants would tell you, that's a horrible return on your investment. But this is a fact that only seems to bother me. Kids don't mind a little frost bite.

I don't mean to sound like such a grump. I do actually love watching them make snow angels and throw snowballs at each other (but not at me!!!), and  I also love the taste of snow cream and hot chocolate. It's just the Instagram pressure to make it magical that gets to me. I feel guilty if I don't make the most of it and beautifully document on social media. It's exhausting because what you don't see on Instagram is the child crying who got hit in the face with a snowball. Or that 2 out of 3 kids had to come and strip down after 5 minutes because they forgot to go to the bathroom. Or that you forgot to buy hot chocolate so you had to use 2 old packets found at the back of the pantry and then find a way to stretch it out to 3 mugs without anyone noticing. And finally, no one takes a cute picture of someone spilling that precious hot chocolate all over the living room floor after they BEGGED and PROMISED to be careful if they could drink it while watching a movie.

These are all hypothetical examples of course.

But then I look back at my own Instagram worthy pics and they make me smile. And I almost forget the grinchy attitude I had earlier in the day. I see their little hats and gloves drying off next to the fire and I determine that I will remember to be thankful for that fire and those little hands. And then if I need a little more motivation, I make myself another bowl of chocolate chip snow cream. That combo will perk even the mom with the coldest feet right up.

FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
January 2014
My littlest has her first birthday in a week. I have made no plans and no practice smash cakes. There is no theme and no presents have been bought. My how different is the life of a 3rd child. Poor Lou. Maybe aunt Carmen Keen can give you a pep talk and tell you being the baby is all bad. 

It ain't over until the droopy, dead Christmas tree comes down.

It's 2am on Christmas Eve. Well technically it is Christmas Day but I haven't been to bed so I haven't switched over. I should be in bed but it is so quiet and comfortable and my tree is so pretty. I don't want it all to end.

I just finished the laying out of Santa gifts and I have that wonderful feeling of accomplishment and Christmas spirit. I really really just don't want it to be over. So I will sit here a little longer.

I do love Christmas Day and all the fun and family that goes with it, but I must admit I've always been a little partial to Christmas Eve.

I'm a fan of anticipation. I like waiting in suspense until the big event. I don't look for my
Presents or try to guess what they are. I will voluntarily cover my eyes if I walk in on a surprise for me. So the waiting really is most of the fun. Christmas Day is the big show and once it's over the excitement is gone.

/ / / / / / / / / / / / / / / / /

Well guess who fell asleep writing that blog post on Christmas Eve. This girl. And then there was non stop Christmasing until this moment. This very quiet, relaxed, happy moment. Christmas was the usual beautiful whirlwind of presents, candy, family, delicious food, noise, traveling, more food, and pure joy. We wouldn't have it any other way. But I tell you as I sit here with my feet propped up on the coffee table staring at my slightly droopy Christmas tree, I am happy to be home and back to (somewhat) normal.

We hit my hometown of Senatobia first and enjoyed laughing and eating with my parents and siblings and all the cousins, then we headed down to visit Steve's family in Brandon where we enjoyed more good conversation, food, and cousin play time. Yes I love all of the fun and laughter, but I have become a bit of an introvert in my old age and need a break from all the holly jollies after a while and look forward to quiet couch time. (Give me a day or two and Ill be ready to join the festivities again, just in time for my annual Girls' Trip to South Mississippi. More on that later)

So we made it home mid/late afternoon yesterday and began the great fun of finding where to put all the new gifts when our house seems to already be full of junk. I told Steve this morning that the week after Christmas was such a let down when I was a child, but now as a mother, I weirdly enjoy the practice of getting rid of the old and organizing the new and getting ready for the new year.

I love the start of the new year and all the possibilities. I always have big dreams for weight loss, and healthy eating, and staying on top of the cleaning, emailing, organizing, cooking, and keeping the kids alive. This is when I am my most positive self... Here's hoping I can keep it up!!

Here are a few of my favorite moments from the Christmas festivities. I am so thankful for my goofy family and the joy that they bring to my life!

Waiting patiently

You never know what the favorite gift will be.

home girl with a fancy doll

The stage is set for Dowdle Christmas

Owen and Walt were this year's official "Santas"

Sweet girls

These two were buddies all day

The three musketeers. I love matching pjs.

When the pjs come on that's when the fun begins!

This is us. This is also why I am who I am.

The Summy Cousins

What it looks like when you have enjoyed Christmas to the fullest

FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
December 2010
I might be able to fit all of these new toys/presents in my house, but then I will have to get rid of one of my kids.

Lysol is my new favorite Holiday Scent

It is Monday the 19th. Christmas is less than a week away. Normally that would stress me, but I think we are ready this year. We spent this past weekend just relishing our favorite season. It was a lovely weekend full of all the Christmassy things I love and I couldn't wait to write all about it before going to bed on Sunday night, until all of the sudden it was less than lovely.

We are suffering a minor hiccup in our usual holiday merriment due to the fact that Louisa fell victim to the stomach bug last night around 9pm. She is a pretty easy patient and fell right to sleep after she was (and me, and bathroom, and the living room, and all the blankets were) cleaned up. That is when the fun of parenthood begins.

I really never feel more like a true mother than when I can catch vomit in my bare hands, calmly move the child to the bathtub, and begin mopping every surface of the house with high powered disinfectant without missing a beat (or even gagging). And if any one reading shaking their heads because I should be using more environmentally safe cleaners in my home and around my children, please let me assure you, this was no time for plant based materials. If I had a hazmat suit lying around, I would have used it. Besides, I'm not one to shy away from chemicals in my attempt to rid my house of germs. I have been known to spray my children with Lysol when they come into the house during flu season. (I tell them to close their eyes and hold their breath first so I'm sure it's fine...right?)

Santa is laughing at me isn't he?

But with any luck she will be on the mend in about 24 hours and thanks to some quality isolation time the rest of us will hopefully be spared. Of course, things are looking up because it is daylight and everyone is happy and perky. If anyone else is going to fall ill we know from Mom-experience that it will happen in the middle of the night tonight. Because vomit and fever always happen in the middle of the night. Further proving my mom's theory of "nothing good happens after midnight." A theory that is true for both sicknesses and high school shenanigans.

That's the thing about Christmas spirit. Even the late night stomach bug couldn't ruin all the good feels about our weekend. Because Christmas break began on Friday and the kid's excitement is so contagious. We busted out of Farmington Elementary at 12pm and headed straight to Macy's to deposit our wish lists in the big red Santa mail box. This has been a small yearly tradition that was started because...

A. Amelia loves a mall. Like, watch Tiffany sing "I Think We're Alone Now", loves it. She totally should have been born in the 80s so she could have experienced the hay-day of a Galleria Mall.

B. Also, my children tend to get a bit of stage fright talking to the Man himself. There have been a few tears shed after a Santa visit because someone forgot to mention that one thing they wanted most in the world. You remember Ralphie's embarrassing football moment at the department store when he couldn't remember the name of that beloved rifle? Well, that doesn't just happen in the movies.

Anyway, the letter writing is way less pressure to perform and you can proof read and erase. Very important cause you gots to get that Santa list right, or who knows what crazy stuff you will get.
We still visit santa every year, but only for the obligatory picture.

Friday we had a wonderful party with our friends from our Sunday School class at church. Always such a fun night capped off with a rowdy game of Dirty Santa. My friend Kress and her husband were the lucky recipients of this awesome real life Awkward Family Photo that pre dates camera phones and therefore no one said "yikes! we look scared! Let's take another one."

Saturday was rainy and lazy and filled with christmas movies and present wrapping and take out Chinese food. There is nothing else to say about that. It was perfect. Oh wait, and then the we lost power that prompted a candlelit story time and a quick family run to Walgreens in our PJs for flashlight batteries. When the power came back on and we were tucking the kids in bed, Walt said "That was the funnest night ever!" (Steve and I are nailing this parenting thing. We should totally write a book)

Sunday cold and very Decemberish and we were all smiles on our way to church which is a real Christmas miracle. We then enjoyed lunch and naps and I had a chance to start working on this watercolor for a dear friend. This is just the beginning, but hopefully it is on the way to being what she wants for her mother-in-law's gift. From time to time I paint or draw houses for people so they can remember that special place they called home. It's not a big money maker or anything, but it pays for my Starbucks.

The best way to spread Christmas cheer
is singing loud for all to hear! -Buddy the Elf

After another lazy afternoon we headed back to church to watch the kids' choir concert. In a very un-Summy move we threw caution to the wind and decided to squeeze in a trip to Starry Nights (one of our favorite Memphis Holiday events) on the way home from church. We are not good and spur of the moment things and therefore there were more arguments and crying than I would like, but we did it and can mark it off our 2016 Christmas Bucket List.

I don't know about yall, but that list gets harder and harder to accomplish every year. They are growing so fast and we are getting so busy that it takes real effort to do all of our favorites. The cookie baking, the Zoo Lights, the Starry Nights, The gingerbread houses, Christmas movies and Christmas parties. It's alot and if Im not careful I can let it all stress me out and lose the meaning of the season.

There is one tradition that we make a point to keep it up and that is our Advent/Jesse Tree. We started it 3 years ago and it is a family favorite. Not every night is a complete worship experience because.... 3 kids...one of whom is Louisa. But every night in December we read God's word as a family and point it back to Jesus. So if we don't get those Gingerbread houses made this year, at least we have that.

Merry Christmas!
"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord!" Luke 2:11


FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
December 2013
The crazy holiday baking is in full swing. Consequently, the crazy holiday binge eating has also commenced. Which will soon be followed by the crazy post-holiday fad diet and 2014 workout overdose. Happy Happy Christmas to All!

Just Blousing....I mean Browsing. The Lost Art of Gift Giving

We are in full blown Christmas mode now. The house is decorated (inside and out) and the cookies have been made (and eaten). The kids have only one week left of school and so the countdown is on to get as much shopping done before I have an entourage with me 24/7.

My mom came up to Memphis on Tuesday for our annual Mother/Daughter shopping day. Truth be told, we spent more time chatting and lunching and pointing out ideas for our family than actually purchasing. She and I are the same person in a lot of ways especially when it comes to gift buying. We take great pride in searching for and choosing the perfect gift for each person on our list. Of course this also means we are usually finishing our shopping on the 23rd of December, but that is the price you pay for being picky.

You know what has been helpful for me this year? Those lists that everyone and their mother create to help people on their "perfect gift" quest. You know the ones. They are all over social media.... Top 50 gifts for Her. Top 10 gifts for Him (because 10 items is seriously all you can think of for a man). The best gifts for little girls, teenage boys, and your dog. There is a list out there for everyone. I think more people should take advantage of these lists. Why not? The writer of the list has done the leg work for you so you can show up on Christmas morning with an age/gender appropriate gift for your favorite niece, uncle, or sister-in-law and look like a Gift Genius.

Instead there is a new trend. (I say new but it really has been around all of my adulthood although it seems to get more and more extreme every year.) Im not sure what really started it. Maybe it was the gift registry business that became more hi-tech in the early 2000s. Before Y2K to register for a Wedding gift you just went to Dillard's/Goldsmith's/McRae's or down to the local "fancy dish store" and picked out your favorite china and Authur Court pattern and called it a day. But then came the ability to scan any and everything you could possibly want at Target, Bed Bath and Beyond and other big box stores. I feel like this was the beginning of people saying "No it's not the thought that counts. You strayed from my pre-approved list? You are dead to me." 

Now I must point out that I am not pointing fingers at anyone. This is a First World Wide epidemic. And we are all caught up in it. In an effort to take the guess work out of the holiday season, we have somehow forgotten the meaning of a gift. We have streamlined gift giving almost to the point of making it obsolete.

Think back to the 80s (which everyone knows I like to refer to as the Golden Years). No one told their family what to give them for Christmas. That's how Ralphie ended up with that god awful pink bunny costume, and Kevin MacAllister received that sweater with the big bird knitted on it. Those gifts weren't on a wish list or registry. Those gifts were specially picked out by the gift giver and memories were made. Back then, the only person you could get away with telling exactly what you wanted for Christmas was Santa Claus himself. Because that was the cornerstone of your entire relationship with St. Nick. Anyone else who was giving you a gift had a relationship with you beyond presents. They knew you personally and therefore the gift was representation of that relationship and their desire to bring joy into your life.

Can you tell this has been on my mind? I've been growing frustrated for the past couple of years with the exchanging of the wish lists and couldn't really figure out why. The joy was fading. I started resenting the whole gift giving part of Christmas and felt like it was affecting how my kids viewed gift giving. I want my kids to be able to receive a gift from someone that is not exactly what they want and graciously say thank you because they know that someone picked that for them. I want them to have those memories. I don't want them to grow up thinking everyone gets exactly what they want all of the time. Even at Christmas.

It took reading the Christmas story for the 1 millionth time to remind me of the purpose of a gift. We can look to the wisemen for our inspiration.

"When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedingly with great JOY. And going into the house they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshipped him. Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts, gold and frankincense and myrrh." Matthew 2:10-11

These men came to see Jesus and they brought him wonderful gifts that were picked out specifically for Him. And they had such joy in their hearts because of the opportunity to give something to the Messiah.

Joy. That is what were are supposed to feel this time of year. The custom of giving gifts is meant to remind us of the first Christmas and the gift that God gave us in Christ Jesus.

I would love to get away from the passing lists back and forth and get back to heart of gift giving. I want to think and pray for the person I am buying for and look forward to the surprise and joy on their face when they open it. It may not be the exact thing they would buy for themselves, but maybe, just maybe, it is something they love and didn't even know they wanted. Because I don't want to reduce Christmas presents to a glorified to-do list. Before we know it, my sister and I will be exchanging toilet paper and Diet Cokes (as if I drink diet anything) and wonder why we aren't feeling the Christmas spirit.

We need to stop phoning it in. If we are exchanging gifts with someone, they must be someone important in our lives. I know if we really think about them, we can come up with something that would bring them joy. Sure it is a little harder, but I think everyone on my list deserves more than just what they need from the store.

So if you are reading this, would you join me at reclaiming the fun and joy of a thoughtful and surprising gift? Let's give ourselves the freedom to love on each other and remember those wise men who looked forward to presenting their finest gifts to a baby king. Gifts that could not be found on the Target baby registry.


FACEBOOK FROM THE PAST
December 2011
Guess what you get when you mix multiple batches of cookies, several sticks of butter, Christmas Tree cakes, peppermint mochas, lots of Coke, 3 thanksgiving dinners, marathon carb loading, and a 4 course holiday progressive dinner?... A muffin top.  (Some things never change)