So here we are. It has been a whole week and Im just now sitting back down to this. I knew it would be tough. Life is crazy these days. Not just for me, I know. It is crazy for everyone. I often talk to my mom about how much more hurried and rushed we feel today compared to when I was a kid. I mean, I think that is the case. I do remember that she was overwhelmed and wild and we drove her completely nuts so maybe it wasn't so different.
Looking back and thinking of my mom during those years is part of why I want to write this blog. She was so busy working and being a mom and cleaning and cooking and managing the household budget and driving us all over town. I watched her and it was hard for her. All she ever really wanted to do was be at home with us. She was a Home Economics major and that was (and still is) her passion. She worked because it was necessary for us to do all the extras that we wanted to do. So even when working she was doing it for us.
Thankfully, I have this opportunity to be at home. To run the daily operations of the Summy household and not have to juggle with it another job outside these walls. I have mad respect for all those moms who do what my mom did. That's a lot of hats and I personally couldn't wear them all.
So back to what this has to do with my writing. I've had this desire to write for a while. Really since being at home. I have a lot of words in my head and I want to get them out. My kids don't really want to hear them. And neither does my husband. Why not put them out there for the internet to read? But here's the problem... and I am just being honest... I don't read blogs. I rarely read at all, but I really never read a blog. So how does one write something she would never read herself? Seems a little hypocritical. Right? I don't read long blogs because I don't really have time to sit and read. I see posts that look interesting and think "Oh. I need to come back to that one. maybe next time I'm alone in bathroom." Seriously, that's what I think (Full disclosure). However, I never actually come back to those because there are 1000 other interesting posts that come across my newsfeed before I get a chance. At least my intentions are good.
So that got me thinking. What would I write that would not be the same Mom stuff that is already out there. Someone else has written every single thing from every different perspective about being a Mom. And they have done it better than I could. Im not an authority on anything. Fashion? Uh no. Cooking? Nope. Healthy Lifestyle? absolutely not. Example of the perfect Godly wife and mum? Please don't make me laugh! The internet is full of really smart people writing about things that they know and encouraging other people to listen as they drop some knowledge on the subject. That is what I was missing. The topic. The niche. That thing that reigns in all of these random thoughts and turns them into something special. Without it I was writing without a purpose. And I need a purpose for everything. It's a sickness. Without purpose things hardly seem necessary or worth while.
I promise I have a point.... I will try to get to it now. I haven't ironed out all the details, but I think my purpose is my kids. Like my mom, I seem to have found/stumbled upon the joy of motherhood. It didn't happen immediately for me and it didn't happen all at once. I dug my heels in for years trying to do something "more important" and "more profitable" and just "more" than being a mom. But now I get it. I've spent the last 2 years reading the Bible cover to cover and I have noticed how my perspective/world view has changed. God has shown me This IS it. THIS is what Im made for. My one job. Love these kids and do it well. They see me screw this up every single day... sometimes as early as 9am. But every day I learn something from them. Something from God. Something from the world. And that is why I will write. I want to tell them all these things. I want them to have a front row seat to the craziness in their mom's head and hopefully learn a little something too.
So to Amelia, Walt, and Louisa. Enjoy. I will drop all my mom knowledge on you. And I will most definitely embarrass you (and myself) in the process.